Start With Truth

January has a way of seducing people into pretending.

For years, as a schoolteacher, during my corporate years at Franklin Covey, and now as a coach, I’ve watched people create goals and resolutions from their heads rather than their lived reality. From what they see others doing. From comparison, adrenaline, or whim.

You’ve probably seen it too. Maybe even up close.

This is the time of year when we give far too much attention to performance, fantasy, and our own brand of delusion about how transformation actually works. If you need evidence, head to the appendix at the end of this article, where I outline the research supporting my claim that most New Year’s goals are set from cognitive bias, social comparison, and dysregulated emotional states—not from truth or personal alignment.

This is why New Year’s resolutions fail at rates of 80–92%

(Norcross & Vangarelli, 1988; updated studies confirm similar outcomes).

And there’s one core reason for this:
Many of us want a newer, more improved version of ourselves.

There is nothing wrong with that desire. I support it.

What doesn’t work is the way we strategically plan our lives in pursuit of it.

The old ways of setting intentions often lead to subpar results. They are how:

• Brilliant humans create lives they don’t actually want

• Leaders overcommit beyond their capacity

• People chase identities that look good on paper but feel hollow in the body

When this happens, many of you eventually find your way to SoulSalt for support.

Because there is another way.

The Alternative to Performance-Based Goal Setting

There is a more real and sustainable way. And that way is truth.

Not yearning.
Not performance.
Not pressure.

Truth.
And more specifically … your truth.

I’m bold enough to say this clearly: most goals fail because they were never honest to begin with.

That’s why I created a self-assessment grid to help you discern whether the goal you just set came from your rear end—or from the cells of your soul.

What Truth Is (and What It Isn’t)

Truth Is:

• Saying the thing that needs to be said

• A quiet presence of “what is”

• A starting point for choice and soul authority

• Alignment of body, mind, and soul

• The moment you feel cognitive weight lift

• What emerges when your nervous system regulates

• Responsible and reasonable

• A homecoming

Truth Is Not:

• Dramatic or performative

• A confession booth

• Overwhelming or chaotic

• Shame-based or self-attacking

• A drive to “fix” everything

• Scattering or destabilizing

• Victimhood or bullying

• A detour into someone else’s expectations

Truth is the most fundamental orientation you have. It’s where I start with every executive and reinvention client I work with. It’s what we excavate in my book and throughout the SoulSalt methodology.

Before I plan or coach clients on their soul strategy plans, we excavate.

Not your entire past. Just three to four intentionally designed exercises that return you to reality and establish deep-rooted foundations.

Why Truth-Based Planning Works

Here’s what I’ve learned:

Truth regulates.
Truth aligns.
Truth clears the fog.

Truth is the gateway to real choice.

While I don’t have the time or space here to walk you through the full Soul-Strategy process, the prompts below will help you begin planning from what is real and true for you.

The SoulSalt Prompts: Start With What Is

Take a moment to answer these honestly:

• What hurts?

• What’s unfinished?

• What are you longing for but afraid to admit?

• What must end so something truer can begin?

• What needs your attention now—not someday?

• What have you been pretending not to know because naming it would require change?

If you answered these earnestly, congratulations. You now hold some of the quiet architecture of your own truth.

You don’t need to publish it.
You don’t need to justify it.
You only need to acknowledge it.

These truths won’t collapse beneath you. They are a starting point.

Now, choose one truth from your answers. Just one.

Name the truth you are finally ready to honor in 2026.
Let it become the keystone of your year.

Trust yourself as you stay attuned to it, because it is likely:

• Something your body already knows

• Something your mind has circled for months

• Something your heart has been whispering

• Something you are ready to act on

Your Turn

Write it down.
Post it if you want.
Whisper it if that’s all you can do.

And if you feel called to reach out, because you want more formulation, facilitation, structure, and accountability, I’m here. I’ll be on your success team for 2026.

Because transformation doesn’t come from wishing.
It comes from doing, being, failing, trying again, and staying consistent.

And it all begins with truth.

Appendix: Why Most New Year’s Goals Are Built on Fantasy, Not Fact

1. Unrealistic Optimism Bias

(Weinstein, 1980s → ongoing research)
Humans consistently overestimate what they can accomplish and underestimate obstacles—especially during “fresh start” moments like January.

Translation: At New Year’s, people think in fantasies, not facts.

2. The Fresh Start Effect

(Milkman et al., 2014)
Temporal landmarks create a psychological split between the “old me” and “new me,” boosting motivation temporarily while encouraging magical thinking.

Translation: January invites reinvention without examination.

3. Identity-Based Motivation Theory

(Oyserman, 2009)
People set goals based on who they should be, not who they are.

Translation: Performance replaces authenticity.

4. Social Comparison Theory

(Festinger, 1954 → ongoing studies)
Goal adoption increases when people see others pursuing goals, especially on social media.

Translation: Many resolutions are borrowed, not born.

5. Ego Depletion & Overcommitment

(Baumeister, 1998; Hagger et al.)
Exhaustion leads people to overcommit as psychological compensation.

Translation: We plan from depletion, not clarity.

6. The Planning Fallacy

(Kahneman & Tversky, 1979)
We underestimate time, effort, and emotional capacity—especially in January.

Translation: Clean slates distort reality.

7. Emotional Avoidance Patterns

(Acceptance & Commitment Theory)
Big goals often serve as distractions from emotional discomfort.

Translation: Resolutions can be avoidance strategies.

8. Neuroscience of Dysregulation

When the nervous system is in survival mode, the brain cannot create realistic strategic plans.

Translation: Goals set in stress, shame, or comparison don’t stick.

Summary

Psychology and neuroscience agree:
Most New Year’s resolutions come from cognitive bias, social comparison, and emotional dysregulation—not truth or alignment.

That’s why they fail.

We don’t fail because we lack discipline.
We fail because our goals weren’t honest to begin with.